Laying on the bed

"Etherized upon a table"
I am on the bed listening to the raging thunder outside. Just yet, the hails started knocking on the window panes; I didn't answer. I am as lifeless as the "pair of ragged claws scuttling across the floors of silent sees". It appears that the life in me is being remoted away.
There is this thin line in my entity; in between myself and life. This mark, that is left behind when two things are combined together with some glue; this artificiality. In the past i had tried to diminish this line; to become one with the life, but all in vain. And now, sometimes in the nights, I feel that the line is cracking. I wake up to hear those subtle quiet quakes which rock my soul. I only wonder laying in the bed that when will it hit with the full force, when will the Richter scale of my body celebrate this record? I have already witnessed the death and disaster it will bring; in my thoughts. In my mind I have detailed it all. But I am scared. I am scared that it wont be a surprise any more, and I will be deprived of my right to weep upon it. The grief will instill my heart, till it bursts into pieces.
My sunshine is being taken away from me. I look in the sky to find this hollow sphere of raging darkness. I want my sunshine back! I want her to be with me forever. I do not want to lose her. I want her to cover me with her gentle rays when I will lay thirsty and starving in the desert of lost youth. I want her to take me before those voultures can piece me.