Monday, October 30, 2006

Ciabbata

I have realized that my quest is not for the answers to the questions, but for the questions that linger in my existence. There are things that I observe, and for every instance that I observe is a set pattern - a predictable pattern. I can predict, but this leads to an overwhelming question that what is the question for which I am observing it?
Apart from that, each new day in front of the mirror I see this guy, and think that if I were him, I would brush my teeth right now, and shave this fur of my face. I am consequently defined by what I do not wish to become. This is not a life, its a false positive of a life. How unstable can one be? My only effort is to hold of and ward off what is inevitable.
And then I have these memories, which basically define me. I am a function of this time that I have spent:
[Me=f(t)= Integral (first day of life to this day) f(t)dt]
When I first read about Gregor Samsa in Kafka's Metamorphosis, I thought of DDT. But that is beside the point.
How pathetically, I define myself with a mathematical expression. Its almost genius, almost.

4 comments:

4ndi Land said...

men and women from all walks of life, from every civilizations have attempted to define themselves. it is neither genius nor stupid that you tried to define yourself, in a moment of introspection, by a mathematical equation. it is rather telling of who you are, and you should dig deeper into that definition to find anotehr deeper definition. You will never cease to question your identity, your purpose,your existence. and its important to take the time to question, even if you know there may never be a static answer.

4ndi Land said...

also, i find it rather amusing and interesting too that the title of your post on introspection and self definition is the name of a tough foreign levain bread.
tough, chewy, simple, basic
strange, immigrant, cultural
bread, the body of christ, the foundation of food, comfortable, earthy, down to earth, common to all peoples, international, food feeds the body what feeds the soul?...

Vincent said...

aaaa ...
a soul ciabbata?

4ndi Land said...

exactly