Wednesday, August 17, 2005

We did it!!!!!

Ten years ago we founded Vincent Research Labratories for Collaboration of stupid ideas in Literature with Science with a promise to uncover the mysteries that have haunted the english literature since early modern period. We are proud to announce that we have successfully discovered, uncovered, stripped off, and unvieled a various aspects of crazy science. We shall be presenting our discoveries and uncoveries in the upcoming articles. The Constituency Department of VRLCSILS has decided to publish their findings on the historically unidentified constituents of famous potions in literature, under GNU public liscence. We will be revealing the reciepies/ingredients/make-it-yourself-guides of , but not limited to the following:

1) Love in Idleness nectar. (Origianlly created by Oberon by a flower, as claimed by Shakespeare, but that proved to be a hoax. The active ingrediant is Sildenafil Citrate which is used in Viagra nowdays).
2) Picture Perfect Paints (Used by Basil to paint the picture of Dorian Gray)
3) Metamorphosis Catalyst Steak (eaten by Gregor Samsa the night before he turned into a roach. Side orders include blue cheese, and horse's dipshit)
4) Out of Sight Death potion a.k.a I am Sick O Sick! (used in many epic tales. One example is the death of Regan in Lear off the stage)
5) The patient Bullet: This bullet has claimed lives of many a protagonists and antagonists alike. The bullet is observed to sit waiting outside the house of the victim in the stairs till he returns from work. (Young Wurther was killed by such a bullet, however the bullet didnt have to wait at point blank range, in his case.)
6) Blitz Kriek Liquor (A person tries to find a Clean Well Lighted place after getting drunk on this serum. Hemingway discovered it)
7) Devilsbay.com (if you want to sell your soul to devil, this is where to get a good bargain. Goethe did not from utterly cruel intentions specified this website)
8) Heinz Tommato Ketchup (and you thought that God made Terresa Heinz Kerry like that?)

Please email us of any questions you may have. Let us know if there is any specific potion you think we should study.

6 comments:

4ndi Land said...

wao, first time i see u quoting Dora the Explorer:
We did it!
whats next? Vamonos, let's go!?

Vincent said...

I should have said Eurika and should have ran out ball-swinging-naked, right?

Vincent said...

I do not have a pre-schooler in my house other than myself. I have not been educated on the matters of Dora and her explorations other than by google.com. I think Dora however, fits in the same category as Herodotus, and Ibn-e-Batuta.
Teapot may be able to enlighten us further if she desires so.

Vincent said...

Hey, how do you discourage a stalker in german? Tell him that you work for Gustapo?

Vincent said...

your stalkers must be really old then!!

4ndi Land said...

dora, the optimist.
dora, the linguist.
dora, the socialite who befriended ape and man alike.
dora, who skips her way through trials and danger.
dora, how we love thee, how we long to walk alongside you, to find treasures unknown, to count our way up and down number mountain, and to read our way into Letter town.
Long live Dora, every 3-year-old's best friend.